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where I will promote the karat gold and sterling silver genuine gem stone jewelry that I lovingly design and fashion as well as muse over the daily doings of my American family struggling to keep our heads above water in 2010.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Pregnancy Pact in MA City.....

OK - let me say first that I know that this movie premiere on Lifetime tonight is fiction...

It is loosely based on fact about a coastal seaport in MA where there was a huge spike in teen pregnancy in 2008, supposedly the result of a pregnancy pact between 17 girls as I remember from the news reports, but 18 girls in the movie.

I saw on my local news channel yesterday and again this morning that the families of some of the young girls are angry and upset that this movie was made, and vowed not to watch it.

Well, I'm watching it. And it doesn't matter to me whether it is fact based on a series of incidents in MA or Anytown, USA.

This is a real concern as we parents work to raise our children to be happy and healthy adults.  We want them to make choices, informed choices and to be aware that they ARE making choices every day - yes, even when they are 13 or 14 or 15 etc.

We also want to raise them to be responsible for their choices...so that life doesn't just "happen" to them.

So yes, this means talking about sex and pregnancy when our children are young...really young.  And it also means talking to our boys as well as our girls so that boys understand that they have a responsibility to the unplanned (or planned) child as well. 

I realized that I missed the boat with my oldest daughter when she was not quite 12 yrs old.  We were driving in my car...all 4 of my kids were with me and my oldest spotted a young girl wheeling a baby stroller up the hill we were driving down.  She remarked "I think it is so unfair that people talk bad about teenage girls having babies".


I really panicked inside as I saw our generation gap for the first time.

What I wanted most for her to avoid as a "poor choice" in a limitless world for her was in fact to her indeed a "normal" phenomenon and "no big deal". 

It was a true eye opener for me, and only the beginning of unforseen issues I had to deal with way before I felt ready for them.

So - what's the lesson here?

Talk to your kids...constantly...

Don't be afraid to set your standards to them...

I found that car rides with one child at a time were a really good place to touch base.  It's a neutral place and you don't have to be so "in your face" that your child can relax and open up to you.

And finally...avoid denial...for whatever happens to someone elses child can just as easily happen to yours.

Of course teen pregnancy is only one issue of many potential interruptions in our childs future...soooo
Ditto: Cigarettes, Drugs, Alcohol....

Don't give up - the journey is long - but worth every minute!


  1. And when they're in the car you've got a captive audience. Turn off the radio, pull the dang ear plugs from their ipods etc out of their ears. Use the time wisely.

    I feel the same with young children, don't plopped them in the back seat of your mini van and turn on the vcr/dvd. Talk, interact with your kids.

    Be the driver to events as much as possible. One can really learn alot when kids are together in a car and talk to each other. They forget you're there and you can get quite an ear fullo.


  2. Sandy,

    Thank you for taking this a step further. You are exactly right.


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